Mr. & Mrs. // Learning to Laugh

Awwww... look at engaged us up there. So stinking cute. And so oblivious to all that is lying ahead: all the ups and downs and laughs and cries and general crazy wonderfulness that is marriage. I know, I know. We haven't even been married three whole years yet. There's an old-timer out there somewhere scoffing and saying "honey, you ain't seen nothing yet." I'm not totally naive. I'm aware that there's plenty more challenges and adventures ahead that we can't even begin to imagine. What do we know?

Well, I feel like we do know a little bit. Today, I want to share one of the biggest lessons I've learned since getting married on that mild October day in 2012. It's a lesson I often forget to live by, but it's also a lesson that I have been actively trying to remember.

That lesson is simple: be willing to laugh.

Before our wedding, a family friend imparted this nugget of wisdom: learn to laugh at yourself, at your circumstances, and at each other. Of course, you have to time that last one right. I don't mean crack up at your partner when they're genuinely upset. That would just compound your issues. Let me explain,

Life is full of setbacks, failures, difficulties, and just downright bad days. Recently, there was a time when I let these various obstacles and difficulties truly weigh my spirits. I walked around grumpy, irritable, and taking everything way too seriously. Every joke felt like an intended slight. Every little disagreement had the potential to turn into an explosive argument. Everyday, I was genuinely upset and out-of-sorts, allowing too many things to burden and rob me of the simple joy of everyday life.

But then, one day, I just started laughing. My husband and I were in the middle of a mild disagreement, but one that had the potential to turn into a real, genuine argument. To be honest, I can't even recall the topic of the fuss. I do remember that I was being intentionally difficult and obstinate, despite knowing that my position was the wrong one. But then, something Mark said or did in frustration just struck me as funny. I started to laugh and just like that, my anger was gone. I realized how stupid I was being, how unfair. At first, my husband's expression was surprised--what was wrong with this crazy woman?-- and then he too began to laugh. And just like that--the fuss was over. Instead, we were sitting in the living room laughing our heads off. Once our cackling subsided, we were able to talk civilly, solve the issue, and move on.

While the incident may sound silly, it taught me that laughter is so vitally important not only in a marriage, but just in everyday life. Since then, I've learned (and am still learning) how being willing to laugh can make seemingly insurmountable problems seem trivial and doable. When I have a bad day and then get cut off by an angry driver on my way home, I could either rant and rave about it...or laugh to myself. When I destroy supper (which doesn't happen often, but has occurred at least once in my cooking life), I could either bang pots around in frustration or throw my hands up and laugh oh well.

Life is much too short to stomp through, unhappy and irritable. When you go that route, you not only upset yourself but everyone around you. Instead, just give in and laugh about it. You may be surprised--like me--to realize how much better it makes you feel.

Book Club // Spring Read

Thanks to everyone who joined in our last two book club discussions of Z: A Novel of Zelda Fitzgerald and Where'd You Go Bernadette. We loved hearing your thoughts on these two novels! With my starting a new job, April turned out to be a bit hectic for Mark and me. So Whitney of Whitney Ann (the other organizer of this collaborative book club series) kindly agreed to turn our April read into a "spring read" encompassing both April and May.

Our spring read will be The Casual Vacancy by J.K. Rowling. As a member of the Harry Potter generation, I was both cautious and excited to begin reading this book. On the one hand, I couldn't wait to delve into another Rowling novel, but on the other hand, it just felt well...weird for it not to be a Harry Potter book.  I am so glad I got over my weirdness because there is truly nothing like Rowling's distinctive storytelling ability.

If you want to read along and participate in our next book discussion, run out and pick up a copy of this novel at your local library or book store. The next discussion will be May 27th!

Happy reading!

Follow Us On BlogLovin

Hello, everyone!

You may have noticed some changes around here this week: namely, the name and layout of our blog. We'll dive into the why's and how's of the change later this week, but for now I wanted to remind everyone to follow along on BlogLovin'. It's a great way to keep track of all the blogs you follow. I use it and love it! Click on the link below to follow! 

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Living Small: Creating a Capsule Wardrobe

"So... I think I may get rid of all my clothes." Wait. What the what?
Yes, you read that first line correctly. Over the weekend, I took the plunge and emptied my closet. You may be wondering why on earth I did such a thing. What could possibly motivate a reasonably sane young woman to pare down her wardrobe so drastically? To toss perfectly fine items into the heartless black donation bag? To--gasp-- purge her shoe rack?

Well, the motivation was fairly simple: this post which led me to this blog.

"Capsule wardrobe" is a term I have previously encountered on the interwebs. In the past, I would scroll through the images of immaculate closets, with their wooden hangers arranged in precise rows, their stacked jeans, their color-coordinated dresses, their neat rows of wedges and flats standing at the ready. Raising my eyebrows in disbelief, I noted that some of these closets even had room for artwork. I mean, really? Come on now.

Yet the more I read, the more the concept of a capsule wardrobe appealed to me. More so than the wardrobe itself... the attitude behind the movement captured my attention. Constantly bombarded with magazine ads, Instagram, emails, and television spots about clothing, clothing, and more clothing, we fall under the delusion that we need this shirt, that skirt, those jeans, that new purse to feel fashionable, with-it, or beautiful. (Cough...Lilly for Target...cough) Sure, if you love the clothes, want the clothes, and have the closet-space for it, then by all means, go buy the clothes. All the clothes. For myself, however, I constantly felt that I was wasting time and money purchasing clothing that I only half-liked, would rarely wear, and then inevitably stuff in the back of my closet. And why? 

But before I go any further...what exactly is a "capsule wardrobe" anyway?

According to Caroline of the blog UnFancy, the main source for all things capsule wardrobe-y, a "capsule wardrobe" is a mini wardrobe consisting of versatile pieces that you totally LOVE to wear. Caroline proceeds into more detail, explaining that for her purposes, a capsule wardrobe consists of just 37 pieces: 9 bottoms, 9 shoes, 15 tops, 2 dresses, and 2 jackets. (The remainder of your clothes either go into storage, get donated, or go to your favorite second-hand shop.) From these 37 pieces, you create numerous mix-and-match outfits which should last you one season, a three-month time period. During that time period, you buy clothes once. Yes, only once. At the beginning of the three months, you take inventory, determine what you need, and purchase additional pieces as necessary.

The overall goals: to possess a closet that consists of items you truly enjoy wearing, to determine your actual style, and to realize that less really is more.

Cue the Great Closet Purge of 2015.

With a cup of black coffee and armed with enough black garbage bags to do Santa proud, I woke early Saturday morning and began the process of creating a spring capsule wardrobe. How did I start?

1. I took everything out of my closet. And I mean everything. I emptied every shelf, bin, hanger, you name it. I deposited all the items on my bed and stepped back to survey the damage. (At this point, I may or may not have dusted and swept the closet. #slightlyOCD)

2. I sorted the clothes into four piles. The piles had fun names. There was the Love-it-and-would-wear-it-right-now pile. The Wow-why-did-I-buy-this pile. The Sometimes-love-it-sometimes-hate-it pile. And the Aww-but-Blahblah-gave-me-this pile.

3. Once the items were sorted, I returned only the "Love-It" items to my closet. Everything else either went into a donation bag or received a second level of scrutiny. For the latter objects, I asked myself "when did I last wear this?" If I had gone through an entire season without wearing it, it went into the donation pile. If I had actually worn it a couple of times and yet was still hesitant about the item, I decided to put it into storage. After all, I could always donate it later.

4. Seven black trash bags later... I felt I had pared my closet down to the items I truly loved to wear. Items that I felt really defined how I dress. I couldn't believe the style that emerged as I arranged the "Love-It" items in my closet. To my surprise, a common theme did exist among my clothing choices. Most of the items possess a simple cut (pencil or A-line skirts, sheath dresses, simple blouses) and vivid hues (coral pink, turquoise, citron, and navy blue), toned down by a few of my customary little black dresses. No wonder I gravitated to these particular items and over again... they all possessed some similar quality that apparently suits my figure and personality. I didn't even know it before, but now it is glaringly obvious.

5. Once I had determined exactly what I wanted to keep, I could assess whether or not I needed any additional items to supplement the wardrobe. As it turns out, I do need a few things. My tee shirt drawer consists of two white shirts. Well.... that's a bit sad. So I may need to supplement this lack by purchasing a few tees and tanks for the spring and summer months. After all, you can't just wear the same shirt over and over again. Additionally. I have no flats. Not even one pair. I'm currently determining whether I want to purchase a pair of TOMS again or just head to TJ Maxx to scout for a basic pair of leather  ballet flats that will match anything. Purchasing my supplemental pieces will complete the entire wardrobe-makeover process. And then... no more clothes shopping until mid-July, when I'll create my late summer capsule wardrobe.

So what did I end up keeping in my closet?

Well, to be honest, I didn't follow UnFancy's 37 piece rule. I considered my own lifestyle and determined what I genuinely needed in order to maintain that lifestyle. For example, since we attend church regularly, I knew I wanted more than the two dresses allotted by UnFancy's wardrobe formula. I knew I would want a few nicer pieces. So here are my final results:

4 casual dresses

4 dressy dresses

2 maxi dresses

4 short skirts

2 maxi skirts

2 cardigans

1 kimono wrap

6 blouses

1 vest

2 tee shirts *

1 tanktop *

2 light sweaters

2 pairs of jeans

3 pairs of shorts

3 wedge heels

1 pair of pumps

2 pairs of sandals

total: 42 items *

*Tee shirts and tanks to be supplemented somewhat. 

An important note: this list excludes my workout gear, outerwear, painting clothes, lounge wear, accessories, and intimates. No one should limit themselves to two socks and two undies, people. Keep it realistic. 

And that's her! To be honest, I was mildly intimated by this minimalist challenge. But I am so happy that I took the plunge and created a simplified wardrobe. It not only has reduced the amount of clutter in my life but has created room for other things--things I really value--as well. For example, Mark has his own storage space for his hiking and camping gear, whereas before these items were stored in the basement. Plus, I now have a craft drawer: my very own space to store my paints, ModPodge, paper, and work materials, stored in space created by emptying out the never-used-sweater storage. It is truly amazing how cutting down the possessions you own can make you feel like you have so much more. 

So, what do you think? Do you think you would try a capsule wardrobe? Do you want to trade it all in and start fresh? Give it a try! I heartily recommend it! 

If you've been inspired by this post

and want to create your own capsule wardrobe, 

please share your progress with me

either on Instagram or in the comments below.

Follow @ampnabi for updates and more wardrobe details!

Coffee Dates // April

Welcome to April's coffee date! I don't know about you, but I am enamored with this spring weather! I just can't get enough of the sunshine, birdsong, and blossoms everywhere. Today in Maryland would certainly qualify as a dreary spring day--with this cool breeze and the slow-moving clouds. But I would still take this weather over the frigidity of winter... any day! So in honor of this new warm(ish) weather, brew yourself a cup of iced coffee and settle in for this month's coffee date!

Obsessing over...
Capsule wardrobes.

You may or may not have heard of this concept, but lately it seems like every where I turn this topic crops up. Whether it be in my email inbox, my Facebook homepage, my Bloglovin' feed, or Instagram. In keeping with a minimalist philosophy, a capsule wardrobe consists of a pared down clothing selection. You essentially limit your wardrobe to a predetermined number of clothing items from which you can create numerous outfits. The often-used number seems to be 37. Thirty-seven pieces including tops, bottoms, dresses, outwear, and shoes.(Your capsule wardrobe understandably excludes your PJ's, undies, workout gear, accessories/jewelry, and swimsuits. Because let's face it: we all need more than, say, two pairs of undies.)

At first, the idea of a "capsule" or "minimalist" wardrobe rankled me. Why toss out all your perfectly good clothes? After all, you spent good money on them! Yet, as I mulled over the idea, I found myself slowing agreeing with the philosophy. Why do I think I need so many pairs of leggings? Or jeans? Or heels? Or cardigans? How much money have I wasted on clothes that were oh-so-cute in the store... only to take them home and find myself wearing them only once or twice. While such a lean closet does still sound a little intimidating, I do find myself wearing the same pieces over and over again anyway. Why not just donate or sell all those pieces I never wear?

So, this weekend... the closet blowout shall begin. I may as well give this a try and see how it goes. Stay tuned for updates!

A life update...

You may remember in this post that I recently began a new job for the vintage furniture shop Repurposed and Refined in downtown Frederick. Three weeks later and I am still in love! I'm sore, creaky, and covered in paint by the end of the day, but I always begin and end the day with a huge smile on my face. While working in a creative capacity does have its drawbacks (less pay, for example), I find myself making time for the things that truly just make my soul happy. I now have time to read, sip my coffee, and meditate in the mornings, whereas before, the long commute to work required that I roll out of bed before the birds even began tweeting. I have time to work on my own creative projects-- such as my Etsy, our home renovations, and my writing. Just this week I was able to add five new items to the Etsy shop!  Plus, working downtown allows me to walk to work, which not only saves on gas money but also provides an opportunity to get some exercise and to enjoy this wonderful spring weather we have been having.

Frederick readers, please feel free to stop by the store and say hello! We are located at 217 W. Patrick Street.

Check this out...

1. the ultimate guide to building your own capsule wardrobe

2. some spring outfit obsessions that I found myself drooling over

3. Don't forget about our book club with Wit&Spice! The general busyness of spring has pushed our April read to May, so you still have time to catch up on your reading if you want to join us. This month's book is The Casual Vacancy by JK Rowling.

Image source for the capsule wardrobe shot can be found here. All other images are my own. 

Photography // Baby Girl Harper

In January, I had the honor of conducting this sweet couple's maternity session. Now, four months later, they have a pink-bowed bundle of joy named Emma. Last Friday, we stepped out into the lovely spring weather to capture some family-of-three photographs. These are a few of my favorite images from the session.

Our Weekend in Photos // Spring in the City

Tax week for the self-employed is no festive holiday. We cinch our belts tighter and grumble at the happy shop posters and bulletins asking "what will YOU do with your refund?" Bah-humbug. Yet one benefit of living near a big city is the vast amount of available events and pastimes that are free. One of those delightfully free things is simply walking around the city enjoying the breathtaking spring weather. With this in mind, Mark and I woke up early Saturday and hopped a metro train to DC where we spent the day with sun on our shoulders, 

After spending the morning at the zoo (where I woefully did not take any pictures), we hiked up what seemed a never-ending hill to reach a metro station. Along the way, we passed row after row of gorgeous homes, all of which gave me googley-eyes. If only they didn't have million-dollar pricetags to accompany them.

One of my favorite places to visit in D.C is the Botanical Garden. Even though the flowers always seem the same, there's just something so tranquil about that place. So much light and color and natural beauty contained in one space, quietly growing in the center of such a bustling city.

For good eats, Mark and I love to head to Good Stuff Eatery or We the Pizza in the Capitol Hill neighborhood. These two yummy restaurants are fun places to hit if we're spending the day in the mall area. Plus, they're a relatively short walk away from the Eastern Market, one of my favorite DC attractions.

Our day concluded with sun-burned shoulders and sore feet. I don't know about you, but those two things signify a day well spent: outside in the sunshine with my honey. This weekend also reminded me that I definitely need to pull my spring and summer clothes out of storage. Sandal weather has arrived, my friends!

What did you do this weekend?  

Also, feel free to share some of your favorite DC spots!